laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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