I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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