Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
