Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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