In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
