Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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