Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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