HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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