If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize