is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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