you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
this just has baby written all over it
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
