Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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