Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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