I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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