handjob tips. give me some.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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