ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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