ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
