your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize