I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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