He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
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