I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize