Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
