im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
