I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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