Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
