I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
she looked like the before picture.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
