i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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