Say something about gay babies.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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