S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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