i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
