I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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