Buhtt sex?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
A bitchslap is in order.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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