All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It's shark week go big or go home
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
