They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
