i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
