It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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