Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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