remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
