she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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