We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
