I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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