Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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