I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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