would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Randomize
