Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
