Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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