i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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