You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
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