Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
