so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
