I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
